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Sex and Spirituality: Using art and contraceptives to teach sexual health

Posted on 14. Dec, 2011 by in Condoms, Contraception, reproductive health, RH in the Philippines, Safe (Sensible) Sex, SASSy contests, SASsy Events

Sex and Spirituality: Using art and contraceptives to teach sexual health

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Ms. Anna R. Oposa
Project Manager
ART-H Mandala Contest
+63917-851-0209
sexandsensibilities@gmail.com

SEX AND SPIRITUALITY:
USING ART AND CONTRACEPTIVES TO TEACH SEXUAL HEALTH

(Quezon City, Philippines—December 14, 2011) Sex and Sensibilities (SAS), in partnership with DKT Reproductive Health (Frenzy Condoms and Filipinay), held a mandala art making contest using contraceptives at the University of the Philippines-Diliman.

Over fifty (50) students attended the ART-H Primer, a sexual health workshop and mandala making orientation, in Palma Hall. The participants then created mandalas using Frenzy condoms and birth control pills provided by DKT-Reproductive Health.

UP students at work

Utilizing the power of social media, the students’ designs and messages on key topics such as reproductive health and informed choice went viral on Facebook and Twitter. The project stimulated a lively discussion among the social networks. The use of contraceptives as art to communicate pressing issues also received a positive response from the public.

The UP Samahan sa Agham Pampulitika landed in 3rd place and received P10,000 in cash prize for their work entitled, “Beyond pills and condoms: EQUALITY and UNDERSTANDING.” The UP Artists’ Circle Sorority placed second and received P12,000 for their mandala called, “Give life without losing yours.” The grand prize was awarded to the UP Visual Communication students from the College of Fine Arts. Their artwork received P15,000, and an additional P2,000 from the Democratic Socialist Women of the Philippines for the best tagline, “Safety in Diversity.”

“Safety in Diversity” by the UP Visual Communication Students

The word “mandala” is Sanskrit for both “circle” and “center.” Mandalas are reflections of the spiritual self because they offer a unique and powerful way to self-discovery and healing through the use of imagery, symbolism, color and balance.

This project was supported by the UP-Diliman based network, RH AGENDA (Reproductive Health and Gender Advocates Movement) and sponsored by DKT Reproductive Health, manufacturer of Frenzy condoms and Filipinay line of contraceptive pills.

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Sex and Sensibilities.com (SAS) is a non-profit website committed to improving the level of understanding of sexual reproductive health rights among Filipinos through the dissemination of accurate, practical and factual information on STI/HIV prevention and population and development in governance. SAS open to all, and is represented in other online media outlets, including popular social media networks Facebook and Twitter.

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Jingle Your Bell: 10 Sexy Adventures to Try for the Holidays

Posted on 01. Dec, 2011 by in Sex & Relationships

Jingle Your Bell: 10 Sexy Adventures to Try for the Holidays

This article was first published on FemaleNetwork.com

By Ana Santos

Looking to liven up your sex life this Christmas season? We’ve listed some ideas that will definitely put you on the Naughty list!

Does Valentine’s Day own the whole idea of romance and love and is Christmas just its more wholesome fuddy-duddy holiday cousin? Don’t be a romantic Scrooge with these tips to put some jingle in your—wink, wink!—bell. Celebrate the holidays with some sizzlin’ hot pizzazz and oomph.

A note from the author:  You’ll probably need the kids, nannies, drivers, in-laws—heck, even the neighbors–to hike off to another place for a couple of hours to participate in any of these activities.  Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

1. GOOD GIRL GONE HO-HO-HO

You’ve spent the whole year being a good girl. What’s one day in the year to let the bad girl inside of you loose and let her rip? Do something you’ve always done, but differently. Instead of booking a hotel room for a quiet getaway, book a motel room—use some of your Christmas bonus and get a suite! See how the illicit feel of a motel hideaway ups the ante on your loving.

You can also bring out some toys and costumes and experiment. ‘Tis the season to be merry, after all.

(Photo by Fabian Mattsson via sxc.hu)

2. BOUDOIR SHOOT

Here’s something that is as much about giving yourself the gift of sexy confidence and beauty as giving something to your man. Give him a Christmas gift that will blow his mind and make him see you in a new light—literally. Schedule a boudoir shoot where you can be beautifully photographed, then, once you have the photo, frame it or put it in an album, wrap it up in a cute little bow, and give him the gift of showing him the sensual, beautiful side of you for Christmas.

A note for the single ladies reading this: You might want to give yourself this gift, just so that you’ll have a concrete reminder of an empowered, sexy, and confident you.

Looking for photographers who can do this tastefully? Check out The Boudoir Dolls atwww.TheBoudoirDolls.com.

(Photo courtesy of TheBoudoirDolls.com)

3. UNWRAP YOURSELF

Do a strip tease for him. Don’t diss the idea as something fake or pretentious—i.e., something that isn’t your style or something that will cause you to just burst out laughing if you try it.

The power of the striptease is actually the “tease” part. Remember the movie Fatal Attraction, in which Michael Douglas’s character was simply watching his wife (Anne Archer) put on her makeup while in her underwear—and getting really turned on just by the sight of her? Channel that.

So you don’t have to think about renting a pole or anything like that (though why not, if you’re game?), but try out the little things that will tease him or make him laugh, like coming out of the bathroom and opening up your robe to gift him with the sight of you decked out in sexy Christmas-themed underwear. Humor is a great turn on, you know!

Check out the Topshop for fun, funky designs in different underwear types like boy leg, briefs, and panties. Plus, SM Department Store’s ladies department always has a wide array of underwear colors in different Yuletide hues that you can mix and match.

(Photo by Marius Muresan via sxc.hu)

4. ALL TIED UP IN A BOW

Take out those beautiful silk ribbons used to wrap those precious gifts and bring them to the bedroom for a little wrapping ribbon bondage. Surprise him and yourself by getting creative with those knots—those Girl Scout lessons would be useful right about now!

Use them to tie each his wrists so he can only watch but not touch, or tie him to the bedpost if you dare. For best results, make sure you also come out on the receiving end of this ribbon ceremony.

(Photo by Aleksandra P. via sxc.hu)

5. LOVE UNDER THE CHRISTMAS TREE

Forget the fireplace—they aren’t exactly needed in our tropical country. Try the Christmas tree as a substitute for making your bells jingle and his balls tingle on Christmas Day. Sometimes all it takes is a new place to bring in a new kinky to your shake and tumble routine.

What better place to make holiday cheer than beside the Christmas tree? And if you can look up at the Christmas tree, you can even feel what it must be like to be a Christmas gift just waiting to be opened—and if the two of you do it right, we guarantee you’ll see stars, and not just of the decorative kind!

(Photo by Barry Meyer via sxc.hu)

6. A COOL MINT CHRISTMAS 

Some books suggest eating ice cream or drinking something cold for a cool, chilly sensation to bring with you as an oral tradition when exploring your partner’s nether regions.

Try this with your Christmas mints and see if it will take his breath away.

(Photo by Jeffrey Collingwood via sxc.hu)

7. KISSING UNDER THE MISTLETOE

If kissing underneath the mistletoe is the tradition, then it’s time for a little relocation. Move it around; instead of just hanging from the ceiling, move it to other places that are also worthy of kissing and being kissed. Like in your décolletage—or how about pinning one onto a pair of delicate lace panties? For good measure, you can also pin one on his boxers.

(Photo by Julia Freeman-Woolpert via sxc.hu)

8. SEXY TIME GIFT CERTIFICATES

Get him gift certificates that are made out for fun couple things that range from going out for a candlelit dinner, getting a massage together, or winding up in a bubble bath. Set a validity period in which each IOU can be redeemed throughout the year, using milestones like your birthdays or anniversary. Give him bonus points if he redeems all gift certificates in one go.

Looking for ways to get creative with your GCs? You can issue him a check in which the amount paid is for a service rendered, or you can write out destinations on the backs of ticket stubs. You can even print out a boarding pass for a trip to the land of bliss.

(Photo by Michael W via sxc.hu)

9. NAUGHTY LIST

Make a naughty list, a list of things that you’ve been wanting to try with each other. Sometimes it’s as simple as a new sex position; sometimes it’s as daring as making your own film or just knocking boots someplace you’ve never tried it. Put your wishes on scraps of paper, drop them in Kinky Stockings (fishnet are better), and pull them out one by one and see if you have the guts to live them out.

(Photo by Fanginhoon via sxc.hu)

10. 12 SEXY DAYS OF CHRISTMAS 

Write out a list of a sexy things you and your guy can do every day for 12 days until Christmas. Bring out each other’s fun side by downloading a sex app for your preferred gadget and making it a point to give it an intense review. It can even be as simple as going to your favorite restaurant for a candlelit dinner and leaving the mobile phone at home.

Leave these suggestions as notes under his pillow (use scented stationery or wrap them in your best lace panties for maximum impact) or send them out to him every day via SMS.

(Photo by Gary Tamin viasxc.hu)

 

 

 

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5 Things You Need Know About Being Good in Bed

Posted on 07. Nov, 2011 by in Safe (Sensible) Sex, Sex & Relationships

5 Things You Need Know About Being Good in Bed

Our friends from Pfizer hosted a cozy media gathering with Dr. Rosie King,  sex therapist from Australia and author of the book,

Dr. King shared with us the survey results of an Ideal Sex Survey conducted by Harrison Interactive and Pfizer lastDecember 2010. The survey asked 3,282 male and female respondents in 10 Asia Pacific countrieswhat really constitutes good, toe-curling, back arching sex.

We had a rollickin’ good time as Dr. King answered questions not just about sex in general, not stopping to answer even questions about her own sex life. “I talk about everyone else’s sex life, I have no problem talking about my own.” Describing herself as a deeply sexual being, who despite “being a grandmother has been married to a wonderful man for decades who still thinks I’m a babe”.

It wasn’t just Dr. King’s candor that had the journalists in the room laughing. She revealed a lot of surprising things about sex

1.    What is the secret to good sex?

The formula wasn’t acrobatic moves and creative positions.  It’s actually a bit simpler than that. Unanimously, the respondents in the Ideal Sex Survey Asia all said erection hardness and erection longevity (being able to maintain and sustain a erection all the way to the end of sex).  Frequency of sex and intensity of orgasms were all second fiddle to erection hardness.

And don’t knock it as just sex, there are a number of indications and domino effects related to a good role in the hay.  Read on to number 2.

Photo from Health for Better Life

2.  If keeping it hard is the secret to good sex, then how hard is hard?

Make no mistake about it.  In the same way that not all are created equal, not all erections are made equally hard. There are different erection grades, which are tracked in what is called Erection Hardness Scale (EHS). There are four grades and men should always strive for a Grade 4 erection

Grade 4: No erectile dysfunction.  Penis is completely hard and fully rigid.

Grade 3: Mild erectile dysfunction. This is already considered a sub-optimal erection. Penis is hard enough for penetration but not completely hard

 

Grade 2: Moderate erectile dysfunction. Penis is hard but not hard enough for penetration.

Grade 1: Severe erectile dysfunction. Sexual intercourse is not possible.

As for the domino effects we were talking about, men with no erectile dysfunction—the fourth graders, so to speak–have more sex than their grade 3 counterparts. Women whose partners have no erectile dysfunction and thus, had more sex reported feeling more sexy, had more self-esteem and were generally more into their partners.

Also, women report feel safer and more worry-free in bed when their partners wear a condom or if they are on the pill.  Makes sense, doesn’t it? If she’s not worrying about getting pregnant or catching some sexually transmitted infection, she’s more focused on her pleasure and yours. 

Photos from University of East Anglia, Holistic Medicine Works, Fake Food and Andrea’s Easy Vegan Cooking

3.    It’s not just the quality of the erection, but the quality of the relationship

Yep, nothing beats good old-fashioned feelings when it comes to getting’ the shake in your jiggy—and that goes forboth men and women. In the Ideal Sex Survey, both men and women reported that sex is better with a partner they were in a committed relationship with. Committed relationships bring with it security, more confidence and deeper intimacy. How’s that for a vote for monogamy?

Photo from PeaceFruit

4.    Size really doesn’t matter

This is one of the most fascinating things I learned from Dr. King. “It is only the outer third of a woman’s vagina that has sensation.” And for the cynics in the audience, Dr. King suggested this experiment, “When you get home, the women in this room should try sticking a finger deep inside her vagina and run their nail along side it. You won’t feel a thing. It’s the same reason why she can have a tampon in there.”

Dr. King concluded, “So in reality, a woman only needs a penis about this small”–demonstrating with her thumb and her forefinger a distance that couldn’t be more than 3-4 inches wide–“to pleasure her. It just has to be a hard penis.”

Moving on a more sentimental note, Dr. King said, “Besides, for women, what’s more important is the size of a man’s heart, rather than the size of his penis.”

Photo from Visual Photos

5.    There are different kinds of sex and a lot of it doesn’t happen in the  bedroom

Connection, intimacy and orgasmic heights can be reached and achieved not just through sex. Dr. King, drawing on her more than three decades of clinical experience and her personal experience to make her point. “My husband and I like sex even until now and make it a point to have it regularly. But that’s me. There are some couples who find the same intimacy, pleasure and connection by doing other things—even from just watching TV or washing the dishes together.”

Dr. King ended her session by saying that the results of the Ideal Sex Survey were pretty much universal not just among men and women, but also among the various races and nationalities who took the survey. “It’s not so much our cultures and our nationalities that make us different when it comes to sex. When it comes to this deeply personal and intimate act it is more our humanity that makes us the same.”

Photo from Marriage Thermometer, Cover photo from Johnny Conrad

Find out more about the results of Ideal Sex Survey and what really makes sex “good” in the December / January issue of Playboy Philippines.

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Sexytime: 10 Tips to Safe Self-Pleasuring

Posted on 30. Oct, 2011 by in Sex & Relationships

Sexytime: 10 Tips to Safe Self-Pleasuring

Re-posted from FemaleNetwork.com

By Ana Santos

Masturbation is nothing to be ashamed of. Here are some tips to keep the experience safe, fun, and fabulous.

Contrary to the warnings you may have been told when you were young, masturbation is actually good for you. It is the safest kind of sex; it won’t get you pregnant, and because there are no bodily fluids exchanged, there is no danger of sexually transmitted infections.

According to this comprehensive article on Fox News, there are numerous benefits of masturbation for women, including:

  • Building a resistance to yeast infections.
  • Combating pre-menstrual tension and other physical conditions associated with their menstrual cycles, like cramps.
  • Relieving painful menstruation by increasing blood flow to the pelvic region; reducing pelvic cramping and related backaches.
  • Relieving chronic back pain and increasing threshold for pain.

For couples who masturbate on occasion or regularly, sex with yourself can:

  • Be empowering, especially by helping you to feel better about your body, genitals and sexual response.
  • Deliver some of your most intense orgasms ever, which you’ll now know how to recreate with that special someone!
  • Increase your sexual awareness, giving you the opportunity to discover what turns you on–the sensations and movements that work best to give you the greatest of sexual gratification.
  • Have the potential to enhance your sex life in general, boosting your sexual confidence and turning you into a better lover.
  • Get you or your partner off the hook if neither is available or not in the mood.

So if solo lovin’ is so good for you, what could actually be wrong about it? Well, doing it wrong or unsafely. So before you take some time out to be with yourself, here are some useful things to remember.

1. BE CAREFUL ABOUT WHAT YOU USE.

Do not use sharp metal or steel objects, so lay off the pens or other items with small balls or beads. Avoid objects with parts that can snap off. Just remember, unless it is attached to a living, breathing human, nothing long and pointy, please.

(Photo by cogdogblog via Flickr Creative Commons)

 

2. DO NOT RUB TOO HARD.

According to sexologist Dr. Jagdip Shah, when you masturbate and are in heightened sense of arousal, you may not feel that you are actually hurting yourself. Don’t rub too hard on your vagina or clitoris. If it suddenly starts to hurt, stop. Self-stimulation should feel good, not hurtful. If you find blood and it is not your period, see your OB-Gyn.

(Photo by mike.negus via Flickr Creative Commons)

3. DO IT IN MODERATION IF YOU ARE PREGNANT.

Most doctors will say that it is okay to masturbate even when you’re pregnant, which is a good thing since pregnancy, they say, kicks your hormones into overdrive. But you may want to put it off during the last few months of your pregnancy as orgasms may cause contractions and premature labor. If yours is a delicate pregnancy, check in with your doctor. If you’re too shy to ask your doctor, abstaining might be your best option.

(Photo by bettina n via Flickr Creative Commons)

4. KEEP IT CLEAN, NEAT, AND TRIMMED.

No, we’re not talking about the hair down there, we’re talking about your fingernails. If your preferred method of self-exploration is digital stimulation, make sure you wash your hands before touching yourself to avoid infections. You should also keep your nails neatly trimmed so you don’t accidentally cut or scrape yourself with ragged nails or those pesky hangnails.

(Photo by kpwerker via Flickr Creative Commons)

5. GET LUBED.

When it comes to going solo, lube is your best friend. Use lubricant that is made for condom use because it mimics the vagina’s natural lubrication. Avoid lotion, petroleum jelly, or baby oil which may harm the ph balance of your vagina.

(Photo source: Wikimedia Commons)

 

6. BRING IN THE TOYS.

If you prefer sex toys, make sure you keep them clean. You can also use condoms on them as you would with an actual penis. Just don’t reuse any and remember to use them with lubricant that is specially made for condoms so that they don’t break. Clean them after each use, and remember that the last word on sex toys is no sharing!

(Photo source: Wikimedia Commons)

7. SKIP YOUR FRUITS AND VEGGIES.

Don’t laugh. Some people want to experiment with something innocuous or something that’s just readily there. Hey, the guy in American Pie helped himself to apple pie in quite a figurative fashion. So if those eggplants and bananas are making you curious, just move on and be aware of insects and other chemicals that may be in them–even after they have been washed.

(Photo source: Wikimedia Commons)

 

8. THE ELECTRIC TOOTHBRUSH IS NOT A POCKET VIBRATOR.

For some, the vibrating hum of an electric toothbrush provides a pleasant, tingling sensation. Think twice about using it as a sex toy, though. The bristles may get caught in your nether regions and that will not be pleasant. It might be better to invest in another toy that is actually made for personal stimulation and pleasure.

(Photo by yoppy via Flickr Creative Commons)

9. SOAP AND SHAMPOO.

If you like staying in the shower and letting that jet shower spray spread over to other parts if your body, remember not to use soap or shampoo for added slippery wetness. These may sting rather than stimulate you.

(Photo by the Italian voice viaFlickr Creative Commons)

 

10. BEWARE OF GETTING ADDICTED.

There are people who get hooked on self-pleasure and may prefer their toys to an actual relationship. According to this article from MedicineNet.com, masturbation can be considered a problem “when it inhibits sexual activity with a partner, is done in public, or causes significant distress to the person.” Like Charlotte in that episode of Sex and the City, be careful that the toy or the act don’t take over your life.

(Photo from Sex and the City courtesy of HBO)

Cover photo from  sxc.hu; photo used for illustrative purposes only

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Mandalas from the SAS ART-H Contest

Posted on 06. Oct, 2011 by in Condoms, Contraception, reproductive health, Reproductive Health Bill, RH in the Philippines, Safe (Sensible) Sex, SASSy contests, SASsy Events

Due to unfavorable weather conditions, we had to move the contest proper to Monday, October 3. The UP students were such troopers. They arrived armed with sketches, additional research, extra adhesives and lots of ideas. Their designs were inspired from what they learned at the ART-H Primer, where Sex and Sensibilities gave a sexual health workshop and Prof. John Paul “Lakan” Olivares delivered a mandala making workshop.

The UP students created their final designs using condoms and pills based on what they learned from the primer and explain the relationship between their designs and related issues on informed choice, reproductive health, gender equality, etc.

After three hours of cutting, gluing and working together, they came up with the following products:

IMG_3586
UP Samahan sa Agham Pampulitika

IMG_3580
UP Artists’ Circle Sorority

IMG_3576
UP Circle of Industrial Engineering Majors

IMG_3572
College of Fine Arts Visual Communication students

IMG_3568
UP Association of Political Science Majors

IMG_3563
UP Social Science and Philosophy Student Council

You may read the groups’ respective explanations AND vote for your favorite mandala by clicking “Like” in this album. Make sure you “Like” the Sex and Sensibilities page first! Behind the scenes pictures here.

Many thanks to our sponsor, DKT Reproductive Health and our UP-based partner RH AGENDA for making this possible!

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Why are you moving in? Why not get married?

Posted on 20. Sep, 2011 by in Sex & Relationships

Why are you moving in? Why not get married?

By Mary Ann Santos

Last February, my partner and I decided to affirm our commitment to each by moving in together.  We uprooted ourselves from our respective parents’ homes and quietly started our life together without the usual fanfare of a wedding ceremony.

In a country where there are only two reasons acceptable for living together (one being a fast approaching due date), a childless couple like us choosing to live under one roof raised a lot of eyebrows and elicited a lot of comments and unsolicited advice.

My close circle of friends would tell me, “Get married na, we haven’t been to a wedding for the longest time!”  Uhm, I’m not going to get married for you.  I am going to get married according our plans.

“Buti pumayag ang parents mo,” is another common reaction. After witnessing several marriages crumble in the family, my parents figured out that getting married does not cement “forever” in a relationship.

From the doubtful, I would hear, “Is that an easy way out?”  Nope, not at all. We consider this as the start of our life together.

The horny ones would insinuate with a knowing look, “Wow, so now, you’ll have a lot of sexytime together.”   It’s funny that married couples get to have a lot of this so-called “sexytime”, too, but I hardly hear this kind of comment when couples announce their engagement.

One person even concluded that our decision to live together could be attributed to our horoscopes:  I am a Leo, born under the Snake sign, while my partner is an Aquarius, born in the Year of the Monkey.  According to our stars, I was the one making all the decisions, he said, so I should then decide to marry my partner.  The decision to live together isn’t a power play between our moon and our stars, but a mutual choice we made.

And others would simply just say, “Get married na kasi!” because well… come to think of it, I actually don’t know their reasons anymore.

There was also advice that took on the voice of concern, but was nonetheless, unsolicited, “What about your child?” I would be asked. Our child will carry my partner’s last name and we will take care of him or her with our whole heart and soul just like any parent.   

My partner, on his end, was told:   “Just go and marry her.”  Related to that is what has become my most favorite comment, only because I would hear it so often, “You should get married, especially since you’re the girl.” I really don’t consider myself on the losing end; I am with the man I love!

It never seemed to cross people’s minds that ours is a mutual decision to begin a life together.   But unlike other couples who made a similar choice, but marked it with an engagement, we never got any advice on how to stay strong in our relationship or how to weather any storm.

We both have chosen a path less travelled by others, but it is a path that we feel will strengthen our relationship as more than boyfriend-girlfriend.  And when we do tie the knot, it will be again another mutual decision between us and not according to the sun and moon or friends who just want to attend a wedding.  It will simply be yet another step further in our relationship.

Mary Ann (a.k.a Maps) attended an all-girl Catholic school for her elementary and high school education and got her university degree in a school closely associated with an ultra conservative religious organization.   An NBSB member (No Boyfriend Since Birth) until she met her current partner, her concept of marriage is a formal union of souls.  She also believes that this union can be formalized by living together.

Photo from http://www.azizolious.com

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aRt-H: Sexuality and Spirituality: Using art and contraceptives to teach sexual health

Posted on 09. Sep, 2011 by in Contraception, reproductive health, RH in the Philippines, Safe (Sensible) Sex, SASSy contests, SASsy Events

aRt-H: Sexuality and Spirituality: Using art and contraceptives to teach sexual health

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Ms. Anna Oposa
Project Manager, ART-H Mandala Contest
+63917-851-0209
sas.art.h@gmail.com

USING ART AND CONTRACEPTIVES TO TEACH SEXUAL HEALTH

(Quezon City, Philippines—September 9, 2011) Sex and Sensibilities (SAS), in partnership with DKT Reproductive Health (Frenzy Condoms and Filipinay), will be holding a mandala art making contest using contraceptives on September 26-28 at the University of the Philippines-Diliman. A cash prize of up to P15,000 is at stake for groups with a winning mandala design.

The word “mandala” is Sanskrit for both “circle” and “center.” Mandalas are a good way to communicate sexual health, because mandalas are seen as a model for the organizational structure of life itself. Mandalas are also reflections of the spiritual self because they offer a unique and powerful way to self-discovery and healing through the use of imagery, symbolism, color and balance.

About 100 UP students are expected to participate in the ART-H contest. On Monday, September 26, registered groups will attend the ART-H primer: a sexual health workshop and mandala art making orientation in Palma Hall.

SAS_ART-H poster

During the contest on Tuesday and Wednesday, the participants will create mandalas using Frenzy condoms and birth control pills to be provided by DKT-Reproductive Health. They are expected to create designs linked to the related key issues: reproductive health, maternal health, women’s sexual health rights, and informed choice.

The mandalas will be evaluated based on a panel of judges and the number of most “Likes” on the Sex and Sensibilities Facebook page (www.facebook.com/pages/SexandSensibilitiescom). All artworks will also be displayed in front of the office of the College of Social Science and Philosophy Student Council, located at the West Wing of Palma Hall, for a week.

“By using art, students will get to touch, feel, and interact with condoms and birth control pills. We want to create an environment that will allow young people to ask questions about their sexual health and openly discuss sexuality issues. We see this as a concrete step in fostering a healthy and responsible attitude towards sex among young adults,” says Ms. Ana Santos, founder of SAS. “We highly encourage the participants to attend the workshop as a primer to the contest because the story has to be complete–it is not enough that you’ve touched or felt condoms or know about birth control pills. You need to know how to use them properly and responsibly,” she adds.

DKT Reproductive Health, manufacturer of Frenzy condoms and Filipinay line of contraceptive pills, has always been a staunch supporter of SAS in actively promotion positive sexuality and informed choice.

This project is supported by the UP-Diliman based network, RH AGENDA (Reproductive Health and Gender Advocates Movement).

Students must join in groups of 4-10 members, and must indicate time slot for the ART-H primer: 10AM-12PM or 12-2PM. The participants will then be divided in two groups for the contest on Tuesday, September 27, and Wednesday, September 28 from 11:30AM-1PM at the Palma Hall lobby. The group that lands first place will win P15,000, 2nd P12,000, and 3rd P10,000 in cash.

To inquire and/or register, students may email sas.art.h@gmail.com, or contact +63917-851-0209 or +63917-836-0345 from September 1-22, 2011.

For the complete mechanics and details, please visit www.sexandsensibilities.com and follow @dash_of_sas on Twitter.

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Sex and Sensibilities.com (SAS) is a non-profit website committed to improving the level of understanding of sexual reproductive health rights among Filipinos through the dissemination of accurate, practical and factual information on STI/HIV prevention and population and development in governance. SAS open to all, and is represented in other online media outlets, including popular social media networks Facebook and Twitter.

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ART-H Mandala Making Contest in UP Diliman

Posted on 08. Sep, 2011 by in Contraception, Reproductive Health Bill, RH in the Philippines, Safe (Sensible) Sex, SASSy contests, SASsy Events, Sex & Relationships

ART-H Mandala Making Contest in UP Diliman

DKT Reproductive Health and Filipinay in partnership with Sex and Sensibilities would like to invite all UP-Diliman students to join the contest and win up to PhP15,000 in cash!

This is supported by the UP RH AGENDA (Reproductive Health and Gender Advocates Movement).

 

MECHANICS:

1. All enrolled UP students will be eligible to join the contest. They
must form a group of 4-10 students to create a mandala using pills and
condoms. Materials will be provided. Please register by emailing
sas.art.h@gmail.com, or contacting +63917-851-0209 or +63917-836-0345
from September 1-22, 2011.

2. Groups must indicate which time slot they prefer for the ART-H
Primer on Monday, September 26, 2011 at PH 400: a) 10AM to 12PM or b)
12PM-2PM.

The ART-H Primer consists of a sexual health and mandala art workshop.
Registered groups MUST attend the ART-H Primer.

3. Groups will be divided into two for the contest proper: Batch 1
(Groups 1-5) will create mandalas on Tuesday, September 27, and Batch
2 (Groups 6-10) will decorate it on Wednesday, September 28 at the
Palma Hall Lobby from 11:30AM to 1:00PM).

Based on their learning from the ART-H Primer, student groups will
relate their mandala designs to issues on sexual health rights,
women’s health, and informed choice.

4. Mandalas will be displayed in front of the CSSP Student Council
Office for a week and will be evaluated by a panel of judges. An
online component will also be done where designs will be uploaded on
the Sex and Sensibilities Facebook page
(www.facebook.com/pages/SexandSensibilitiescom) and generate
the most number of “likes” by Wednesday, October 5.*

Criteria:

30%
Number of participants per group who attend the
ART-H Primer on Monday, September 26

35%
Number of “Likes” in the entry as posted on
Sex and Sensibilities FB page

35%
Judges’ Evaluation

PRIZES:

First Prize:
P15,000

Second Prize:
P12,000

Third Prize:
P10,000

*All artwork produced by contestants will remain the property of SexandSensibilities.com and DKT Reproductive Health.

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“Am I good in bed?”

Posted on 31. Aug, 2011 by in Sex & Relationships

“Am I good in bed?”

We got this in our inbox  from Terrie (not her real name) who tells us about her encounter with an old flame who asks her to rate his performance in bed. Terrie asks if she did the right thing by being polite. Read on and tell us what you think—what would be the SASsy thing to do?

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My mobile rang and when I saw the caller ID, I smiled to myself.  An old flame—or old fling might be more like it–I hooked up with some time ago.

Hhhmmm…why would he be calling? I wondered.  Booty call, probably, I thought, answering my own question.

“Hello there,” I murmured when I picked up.

“Uh, hello,” he said, sounding a bit unsure. “It’s me.”

“Yeah, I know. I have caller ID,” I quipped, trying for a joke.

“Uh, I wanted to, uh, ask you something…” he fumbled.

“Yyysssessss…” I said, encouragingly, my curiosity was piqued, but this was beginning to feel and sound like pulling teeth.

“When we were together, was I able to satisfy you?” he asked, when he finally got the sentence out of his mouth.

I yanked my mobile away from my ear. WTF?!? I screamed in my head, but instead asked, “Whhhaattt?!?”

“You know, was I able to satisfy you?”

In the embarrassing momentary silence that followed as I tried to process this conversation and in his desperate attempt to fill the awkward dead air, he tried another question, “Was I good in bed?”

“Uh, dude, that was a long time ago. I don’t remember,” I said.

I was actually stalling. I did remember.

He was terrible in bed.  He came too fast and, I remembered all too well how I wondered if his penis was just small only to come to the horrifying realization that his penis appeared to be small because it had not grown its full potential. It couldn’t get hard.

Size wasn’t the problem—hardness was.

I remember wanting to tell him not to stick me his half-flaccid penis, but in the end, just deciding to be polite. I remember even thinking that it might have been me.

The only thing I liked about him in bed was that he didn’t have to be convinced to use condoms.

“You know, was it okay for you?” he asked, his voice now barely audible.

“You want to ask me that NOW?” I asked incredulously, laughing. You could have asked me that back then. A lot of good this will do me now, I thought.

I could hear him shifting the phone around and instantly felt sorry for him

“No, no,” I explain, “I mean, I’m at the mall and there are a lot of people around.”

What am I supposed to say? You don’t kick a dead horse in the groin!

“I remember you to always being, uh…a considerate lover. But seriously, what’s this about? You didn’t call me to ask me this now.” I was eager to change the subject.

“Well, it’s my fiancée. I don’t know if I make her happy in bed and well, we’re going to get married and I want to make sure I can satisfy her, and…”

His voice trailed off and I just had to laugh, “You call me years after we last had sex to ask me if you were good in bed because you want to give your fiancée an orgasm?!”

“Well, I thought it would be okay to ask you,” he answered sheepishly and I could hear more shifting.

“Wouldn’t it be easier to ask her about your current performance? I don’t know what moves you’ve picked up since we last knocked around, you know.”

“She won’t  talk to me. She just says it was “okay” and I don’t know what she really means by that. And she’s a bit of a prude.”

Uh-oh. I knew exactly what she meant by that. Thinking again that it must have taken him a certain amount of time to muster up the courage to even call me, I give him sound advice about being more romantic, lengthening foreplay and trying my best not to offend him, trying some condoms with erection enhancers.

When I put down the phone, I couldn’t help but feel a bit sad for them. Not because they were having problems with their sex life—what couple doesn’t at some point–but because they couldn’t openly talk about it.

If the fiancée was anything like me, she would be the female equivalent of blue balled. Unsatisfied and bitin and majorly frustrated. And sure, the fiancée might be embarrassed to speak about it because it might look like she was too experienced or too horny (what guy wouldn’t want that?), but wasn’t that what intimacy was all about? Talking to one other about stuff like this?

Sure, it can be embarrassing to talk about sexual performance and what you like and don’t like in bed but was asking an ex-fuck buddy supposed to be a better alternative?

I never heard from the guy again, though I heard from mutual friends that he did get married recently.

I don’t know if my advice helped, but my hope of “best wishes” to the new bride and groom included long hours of deep bedroom talk.

Photos from College Candy and Cosmopolitan

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20 Secrets About Women that Men Should Know

Posted on 21. Aug, 2011 by in Sex & Relationships

20 Secrets About Women that Men Should Know

By Ana P. Santos 

At the risk of being accused of treason and betrayal to the highest level, I am going to reveal (hopefully for the first time), some of womanity’s most guarded secrets — insights on the Y chromosome, its motivations and inner workings. These are words of wisdom, passed on from generation to generation, from girlfriend to girlfriend, mother to daughter, sister to sister. An arsenal of secret weapons meant to tease, to attract or just plain drive you crazy, and fall at our feet following our every whim.

Did you know any of these secrets as truths or did you simply think of them as myths?  What you find out just may surprise you.

1. We have different sets of underwear for different occasions

A sexy lacey thong is hot to look at…but that’s just about it. It is meant to be immediately taken off because to have to wear something like that all day everyday is itchy, uncomfortable and just plain torture.

So to limit such torture, we have divided our undergarments by dress code — our fuck panties for your visual pleasure when we know that we’re gonna get some nooky, and our nice comfy cotton undies for everyday use.

Photo from http://www.thisnext.com/tag/hanky-panky/.

 

2. We wear our ratty underwear on purpose to delay sex

Related to number 1, when on a hot date with a guy we really like, we hold off on sex to get to know him better. We know that if we up the ante too fast, it will probably fizzle out just as fast. Easy come, easy go, right? But with the sexual tension rising, delaying gratification is harder for us than you think. And there’s no deterrent as powerful as the prospect of having first time sex with a guy we really like in a tattered lola panty with mismatched bra — we wouldn’t want to see ourselves naked either.

Photo from http://crasstalk.com/2011/05/qotd-what-do-you-wear-under-there/

3.  We dream of being a sex goddesses…in one way or another  

Even the most prudish, most tight-lipped and squeamish woman always wants to be thought of as a goddess by her man. A sex goddess whose bedroom prowess can make your toes curl.

4. We diss in more detail

When chatting with our girlfriends, the men in our lives who are just passing fancies are the subject of very graphic and detailed dissing. We will share everything from your bad taste in shoes, your staying power or lack thereof, how big you are, how hard you can or can not get, or if you have too much skin where you shouldn’t.  No detail is too small to be left unturned. Blow by blow accounts are the stuff our juicy coffee conversations are made of.

A little something you may want to keep in mind the next time you tell the boys about the latest addition to your body count.

Photo from http://empoweredflowergirl.com/2011/03/empowered-flower-girl-announces-new-workshops-this-spring-and-summer/girl-talk/.

5. We know when you’re cheating

It’s women’s intuition, the genetically built in alarm system which tells us when we should be on red alert. Abrupt changes almost always trip the alarm – sudden weight loss, sudden interest in appearance, wardrobe and schedule. Our spider sense starts to tingle, and when that sensor goes off, we will resort to a number of things to validate our hunch. We look through your phone, we show up at your office in the middle of the day to mark our territory and smoke out the competition. We’ll bait you in conversation using information we’ve picked up from our investigations. Most men are usually not good liars when caught off guard.

6. We dress for other women, not for men

Those extra 30 minutes when we say will only take 5 to get ready? They’re not really to look extra put together for you.  We know that you’ll be checking that we don’t show too much skin, that in general, we look pretty enough. When it comes to appearance, you guys are easy to please – you like us best with our clothes off. It’s really the other women who are more critical. They note every new pound or new wrinkle that has set in. They’ll notice if we’re wearing the wrong kind of shoes and laugh sinisterly inside when they don’t.  The extra 30 minutes is a small price to pay compared to the social suicide of being on the Most Wanted List of the Fashion Police.

Photo from http://www.photl.com/en/196616.html.

7. We check out other women and it does matter who is thinner, fatter or prettier or more successful.

Women by nature are catty and competitive. It may be due in part to the peacock behavior.  It is the female peacock who has the more colorful feathers, she is the who prances around with her feathers spread out in all their glory. Mother Nature made it such so that she could attract the male peacocks. It’s part of a female’s second nature to fan out her feathers and strut around displaying them. That way, we know who of the other peacocks have the prettier feathers.

8. We all want to date a Bad Boy to beef up our score card, but would never take him home to meet our mothers

We all, at some point or another (secretly) want to date a Bad Boy. For some of us, it may by “The Messiah Syndrome” — the crusade where we will try to convert a Bad Boy, but for the most part, a lot of us can appreciate and enjoy a Bad Boy for what he is – a guy who will relish bringing out our hidden rebellious streak. It’s like living out a fantasy  — totally hot, but nothing we would ever want our mothers to know about.

Photo from Zimbio

 

9. We don’t all need to be rescued

We come in all ages, shapes and sizes. Just because we’re young and doe – eyed doesn’t mean we need a big daddy figure to guide us through life. Or because we’re older and more sophisticated, we’re desperate and will jump at any man who comes along. Or if we have a child with no father in sight, we need someone to make an honest woman out of us.  There’s a lot more to us than our age and status, and we know when you’re making an effort to get to know the difference.

10. We fantasize about having threesomes

Two men at our feet, so willing to please us and bow to our every whim –  what more can we ask for?

11. We pluck, shave and wax for one reason — we’re expecting some action.

The time, effort and not to mention pain that we go through in getting ourselves primped up for a hot date is because we expect to get a little somethin’ somethin’. So you can bet that if after all that, you’re just gonna give us peck on the cheek at the end of the date, we’re going to be pretty pissed.

Photo from http://oneboredmommy.blogspot.com/2011/07/shaving-legswhats-appropriate-age-for.html

12.  We don’t like “yes” men

There are some women who are just born Queen Bees. When they stand up, there are always at least 2 guys waiting to pull out her chair, carry her bag and another handful at the sidelines, grateful to just worship the ground she walks on.  She is a Queen Bee, and these boys are simply drones made to make her life easier. And these poor drones are more than happy to do that, not knowing that there is a difference between being a drone and being well, a disposable doormat.

13. We get cranky when we don’t get enough sex

We may need less of it compared to men, but we need it nonetheless. And when we’re not getting enough, we’ll start getting bitchy, and a bit high strung. We need to unwind, too, you know.

14. We fake…a lot

It may be because we like you and don’t want to hurt your feelings, or because we want you stop pummeling us already, but accept it, dude, it just makes things simpler most of the time.

15. We don’t lie, we just manipulate

We don’t really lie – we just omit parts of the truth – the parts that you don’t need to know about, play up what you want to hear and viola! Our version of the truth. It still is the truth – just our own self-serving version of it.

16.  Yes, we do need that many shoes and bags.

Shoes are penis substitutes – that’s why we need the same color in varying styles and every so often, need to buy a new one. Finding a pair of shoes we like is like a sexually charged flirtation which needs to be consummated with the purchase of these shoes so we can take them home and enjoy them.

And the bags? We need just as many to match the shoes.

Photo from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Shoes_and_Bags.jpg

15.  We wish you could get some fashion sense from our gay friends

It’s not that we want you sporting the tight t-shirts and low cut jeans especially if you don’t have the body for it. We don’t want you looking gay and be one of those girls who doesn’t know that her boyfriend is gay.  But we do wish you could at least take a hint from a gay man’s choice of shoes.

16.  We wish you would exert more effort in finding our G-spot.

It’s not a remote control with a multiple choice of buttons, where you just aimlessly press a key and orchestrate a blast off from there, if you know what I mean. Unless your ego can take explicit directions, i.e. to the left, to the left — pay attention to the subtle signs and noises we make.

17.  We worry when we’re not getting enough action from you.

You can’t always be tired or not in the mood. You’re a guy, aren’t you? It may be unfair, but we kinda expect you to be a Boy Scout or a porn star – always ready and at attention.  When we haven’t seen some action for at least a month, we’ll start wondering if you’ve been getting it from someone else, if you’ve just lost interest or worse, you’ve started playing for the other Team.

18.  We carry on a lot of flirtations, but never really carry them out.

There will always be one or two guys in the background that we carry on a flirtation with, through text, email or whatever other media can deliver various innuendos, but most of the time, that’s as far as it goes —  harmless banter. Ok, ok, at the most, we will fantasize about doing another guy when we’re actually doing you. Just be thankful we don’t call out the other guy’s name when we’re heading for the homerun.

Photo from http://www.squidoo.com/5-types-of-men-flirtation

19.  We will always have a love hate relationship with your mother, and most of the other women in your life who came before us.

We want to be the only woman in your life so we’re a little wary about that girl best friend of yours, wondering exactly what kind of history you had, and competing with the sisters-in-law for the approval of your mother.  As much as we hate to admit it, we need to be loved by your mother, or at the very least get her sincere approval.

20.  We like being treated like a ‘girl’ even if we say we don’t.

Even the cast-iron-bitches of our kind can be brought to wobble in the knees when her bags are carried, her hand is held, and flowers are sent to her.  There is nothing more disarming than just being looked after in a non-clingy and expectant “I’m doing this to get your pants” manner…well, unless of course she’s allergic to flowers.

 

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